Interesting Reflections, but I am really more of a Pagan! 7-22-24

• Does the idea of becoming a priest keep coming back time and time again even though you thought you had moved on in your life and forgotten about it?

No, this is a new idea.

• Do you feel called to give more, to be more?

Yes definitely.

• Does your relationship with God sustain you, enliven you, invigorate you in such a way that you want to share His Truth and Love with others?

Not really. I don't believe in God; I do believe that Jesus was an enlightened Bodisattva, one of a few who have walked the earth.

• Do you desire to courageously and selflessly give all to Christ, to cast out into the deep and follow Him, wherever He calls you?

I don't hear Christ calling. However when I hear birds or crickets, I feel the possibility that there is a mysterious something here that is greater than me.

• Do you long for more than what “the world” teaches us to strive for – money, sensuality, power, self-indulgence and comfort at any cost?

I long deeply but I think what I'm longing for is peace.

• Do you have a sneaking suspicion that you are on the brink of a major life decision?

Well, in terms of my drinking I think I need to re-evaluate that activity, i.e., is my drinking serving me or inhibiting me from growing (or both?)

• Are you afraid to tell friends and family that you are thinking about priesthood?

I have very few friends and no family.

• Does the idea of becoming a priest attract you and at the same time frighten you because you feel “unworthy?”

This ever-present belief in God and Jesus that you keep harping on eludes me.

• Have you ever felt your heart move as a priest celebrated the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass and thought what it would be like to stand at his place at the altar?

Not really. But I judge each priest on the basis of their appearance, their speaking skills and if the content of their sermon resonates with me.

• Have others encouraged you to consider priesthood?

A friend suggested becoming a priest as an alternative to a "generally poverty-striken, semi-retired, healing 'ho, bon-vivant, amateur/professional artist-making (or non-making) lifestyle" I'm living now. It was probably said more in jest than anything. But it got me to thinking...how could I possibly give up men? They give me so much pleasure but little else; and drinking and edibles provide a kind of balm to the harshness of living right now. More things to think about. Well, especially even if I did a "don't tell, don't ask thing" I wonder how much work would be required. Then I come to this conclusion, if the pope himself refers to gay & bi men as "faggots" (this same friend tried to make excuses for the Pope's words explaining "He's from a different generation" which I don't buy) who shouldn't become priests it kinda puts the damper on the whole "becoming a priest thing" idea...Another pipe dream. I have so many ; ).