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"Can I see more pictures?"

Often--especially in these wild and wooly times of Post-COVID recovery and acting out (when it seems the dust is still settling from 2021-22) I am asked by clients "Can I see nude photos?"

My usual reply is "No-above my pay grade." And I mean it. Why? Because going down that road is degrading. That ball of worms totally disregards any "gold, healing energy and positive vibes" that I may give (and sometimes receive) during my massage time session with clients. So don't ask. Easy peasy right?

Stamina, integrity and tolerance are strengths I constantly draw upon to continue doing this work with men. I love men. I love massaging men. And the challenge is to not be bitter when--during slow times--within a week or two week period it almost seems like 9 out of 10 clients contact me asking if I'm available; then nothing. Or worse yet I'll get the sincere hack "I read your blog and I really get you and I'd like to make an appointment." Then the no-show. It's ungodly how many men do this and then don't show up (again during slow times like now--not when things are flush and the bookings are coming through like water every week-Yay! The good side slow periods are NOT the norm. I liken this work to surfing; when it's good it's so good; and when it's bad the waves suck and the sharks will bite.

I am so, so proud and grateful to live in this "ultra-city" and proud to be a free queer American male working this weird-ass job in this city that is so absolutely queer friendly (not that I've ever really fit into that all too limiting label of "Gay" -- I'm still not comfortable with that weird "happy-face" description of my chosen sexuality but for the sake of expediency...yada yada). Gold aside I have found the shadow side of doing M4M massage (which is especially glaringly obvious during "slow periods" like now, Feb through the end of April) there is a strange tendency for men (and I think this applies to straight men too) to operate with a certain lack of humanity and kindness when it comes to their dicks. I wonder why? Mine is not to question, but only to accept! So be it. Is it biological? The "nature of the beast?" Perhaps. It's just something that comes with the territory and after so many years of (both complaining and sharing the joy of working on men) hopefully it's something I've come to radically accept. M4M massage is it's own unique animal and has it's own unique strengths and weaknesses as a job, as a vocation whether it's part or full-time. Again the challenge is NOT to be bitter but to be better, to be wiser; no small feat when the bank account keeps shrinking and the price of everything in NYC tends to go up and up and up. And yes too, we working poor are lucky in New York, as it's probably the most generous state in the Union LOL. So my summation, your honor is this "Enjoy the game; when it works it works but don't let the work eat you alive because it can and it will. If you let it, like any other addiiction! Meditate and find beauty and love in other aspects of life--for me it's nature and creativity and making music and dance. You gotta find a balance, constantly be in forgiveness mode and not let that wall of stone encroach around your heart. And celebrate! After all these are the good times. The glass is half-full. As for right now I just finished a wonderful session with a youngish gentlemen who tipped very well (totally unexpected) and the release was great--for both of us. *Sigh* LOL.

May your days and nights be filled with mindful happy endings.

Love and Gracias


PS. and come and get a massage before I move! Hopefully 2023 will be the year that my change in location happens; this city's just too damn expensive y'all! I don't need glamor. I think I need more trees and much less expense. Oh but I will miss those fabulicious Sunday nights at "the Eagle" (always before 9 when the $15 cover starts! LOL. For it's there that I'm dancing my heart out in a phase of my last great dance boogie nights--for, when in doubt, dance it out!

Peace. #saintorr #steveorwhat

If you find any typos, forgive me. Lousy proofreader here.

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